If I could tell myself anything from a year ago It would be relax & don’t cry. A year ago I quit my job to pursue my dreams. When I first launched my website I only had $125 to my name. I spent all my money investing in myself, starting up my business. The week I launched my website no one purchased anything. I automatically went into panic mode. Started to doubt myself, my taste in clothing & the entire idea of trying to start a business in the first place. (Laughing about it now ) I can’t believe I said this to myself “Damn I must not be as fly as I thought I was”. Cause If so they would be buying. Mac this wasn’t such a good idea your ass don’t even have a job anymore.
I was everywhere handing out business cards. (TERRIFIED) I was so shook & had this lump up in my chest. As you can see I’m terrified to do anything that involves public speaking. (You would never know it though) I’m like that meme where it says “I walk around like everything is fine, but deep down inside my shoe, my sock is sliding off.” I drove home discouraged and heartbroken. I kept thinking what am I going to do? I have nothing to fall back on if my dreams don’t workout. I sat in my room for hours crying. Weeks went by and I remember constantly looking for new work. Receiving not one phone call.
One day i just broke down on the staircase. Couldn’t even get my ass up the steps. I was literally broke at that point. I must of cried to God so hard (you know the ugly cry when you don’t have a care left in the world lol) that before I could even get to my amen. I received a call, it was from a woman I had known. The company she worked for had an opening. She recommend me & thought I would be a good fit for the position. I hung up the phone cheesing so hard, wiping my tears thinking “Damn that was fast”! I couldn’t believe I got a job, for a position I didn’t even apply for. From someone I hadn’t spoken to in years. (God works in mysterious ways)
I wasn’t getting paid a lot, but I didn’t care I needed something. A week later I received my first customer. From one of my favorite fashion girls on IG. Time went on & more blessings kept coming. I had received orders back to back. Majority from women I had admired online for years. I was even promoted & offered more money four months in at my new job. God was truly showing me to always trust in him. What’s meant for you will always be.
Looking back I ask myself wth was I so afraid of? I honestly thought I was going to fail. Now don’t get me wrong, I still have my days & I’m not exactly where I want to be in life yet, but I’m working towards it everyday and getting closer by the minute!
Right now If your going through this or anything similar. Please be easy on yourself and trust your process. Have faith in yourself & your story! Take a deep breath & RELAXXXXX! Trust me things will get better. No matter where you are in life, whatever dreams/goals your trying to accomplish you will! God will make a way and see you through. Stay prayed up and keep your faith!
We’re all in this together. It’s not a race and everyone’s journey is different. Don’t compare your path to anyone else’s. We’re all here to uplift and inspire one another.